Sometimes I feel this life is too hard for me, even if I'm a "lucky" person, I mean, I'm not poor, my parents love me and I have some friends. But I'm just stuck in this life. I finished high school last year and I couldn't pass the exam to the university because I'm stupid. So I have been learning English throughout this year. But I don't seem to progress as my classmates do. I'm just a fool. And idk what I'm going to do the next year. Maybe I'll try again do the exam but I don't think I'm going to pass it and I don't have enough money to go to a private university, furthermore idk If I want to spent 5 years of my life at the university. Maybe I'll just get a normal job like the "average" people and I'll spend my whole life hating my boss. But I don't want to be a common person and I'm not sure if the university is for me. I don't even know what is my "passion" but all the people around me want me do be an important person with an important job and idk what I want .-.
Re: What am I supposed to do? .-.
i’ve felt that. even as young as i am, i somehow totally understand everything you wrote down. i never thought of my family as rich or poor, or that i was unlucky because really i just wasn’t. i got what i asked for, i had friends and saw them after classes, and just had a mainly good life. i never understood how wrong i was. my family has been struggling for as long as i can remember with my father not working and my mother trying to afford for me and my two brothers, one of which is in university (or college in american since i’m not sure as i’m a brit) right now. he told me that even when he was just 13 he was worrying about the money and prices for colleges and school applications. my family has gotten through with the help of my mothers side of the family, with money, support and so much other stuff. i’m not trying to make you pity me even though i’m not doing so well, but just remember people understand you. i’m 12. i know that probably isn’t great to hear comparing to you, but i understand. i might not be older or very smart but i just know how to survive somehow, after all this time i’ve learnt how to help myself when i’m sad even though i went through depression myself and currently anxiety. even though i’m young, i have no passion. my one passion would be acting and theatre but nobody believes in me and i have no idea where to start. math is one of the biggest subjects to know and i can barely even do it. and honestly, i’m scared to grow up and just live the ‘average life’ where you hate your boss and dread working. i want to live and enjoy what i do. but i have no clue how. you’ve just got to know that one day it’s all going to come together. i know that one day it’s gonna clock and you’ll realise your passion. all i ask is that when you find it, work for it!! i may not know very much about careers but i promise you it will pay off and even if you don’t know me, i believe in you. i don’t know you but i support you with all of me and honestly i see myself in your place in my future. i have no idea what’s gonna happen to me or what im supposed to do but all i can do is hope. this might not have helped, but i related and wanted to share because i know i’d like to know someone understood all of that. good luck with everything