im losing my mind here. im a junior in high school with no ambition for my future. i do work simply do get it done and to get a grade. i dont know what i want. im losing interest in sports and i only just want to lay at home and do nothing. what do i do?? i hate going to school because its so fucking draining and my grades are terrible compared to my first couple of years in high school. i used to be so studious man, what happened to me? i want to cry and cry and cry and just tell someone what im feeling but ive never done that before; i think i might make my friends uncomfortable bc they have NEVER seen me upset. i cant tell my parents how im feeling because i highly doubt they think emotions that i have are important.. they think they're all temporary. last time i tried to tell my mom how i was feeling awful, she threatened to send me to a psych ward? i just- i dont know anymore. i dont think i want a therapist because that costs too much money and id have to tell my parents how life is going for me. i just wanna cry all night long i cant take it anymore i wish i was in elementary school again where everything was easy and i had no worries i wish time would just stop i need a break for gods sake
Re: what do i do how do i help myself
Hey man.. I'm a couple of years ahead of you, I've just graduated college but I feel so down and lost too. We've all been there, your worries are more than valid. Studies and uni talk are overwhelming for everyone, so I don't want you to feel alone on this because you're absolutely not! Also on a side note, let me advise you not to open up to your parents if you think they're bad listeners.. My mom is a terrible listener and manages to intensify my worries and yet I broke down one day and opened up to her and I regret it big time lmao. But please don't worry about what's coming, be easy on yourself and try to motivate yourself to work harder (NOT at the expense of your wellbeing and mental health). If you feel like slowing down, taking a break, treating yourself.. do it. And make up for this rest later. Your wellbeing comes first *always*, but also if you think better grades would give you a boost, then let's push ourselves a little harder. There were times when I pushed myself despite feeling like absolute shit. Sad, alone, and just shitty in general. But I would work my butt off knowing if I do and it pays off, I will be proud and satisfied and this very feeling tops all. You don't have to be top of the class, but doing *your* best will make *you* satisfied, because only you know how much dedication and effort it took you to get there. So trust me, hard work pays off, not just in terms of grades and ranking, and actually fuck both, but you will look back at yourself and thank that guy for not giving up and pushing himself to the limit. It's only a matter of self-satisfaction and self-gratitude. Also please do not abandon sports, they are a massive game-changer on all levels. You don't have to be a regular if it takes a lot of your time and you want to focus on your studies, but don't give it up completely. It's really a blessing you don't want to live without. It actually aches me right now to remember giving up on gymnastics when the moves got a little challenging for me. I literally said fuck it and stopped showing up. There's not a bit of me that doesn't regret such a lazy ass mistake, honestly!!! I hope you don't follow suit! Cheer up boy, it will be alright, trust me high school is overwhelming and stressful af but as soon as you're in college you literally want to hit your younger self with a brick for all the unnecessary worry you used to put yourself through. YOU WILL DO GREAT, YOU'LL END UP EXACTLY WHERE YOU'LL BLOSSOM.. but please do try to keep yourself motivated even if you're drained to the core. You'll be proud of the results, so always lay your focus on the goal not how much it's draining you to get there. Back in high school, my classmates and I used to share our dream grades and assess our performances every once in a while to stay on track and never lose focus. Neither of us reached our "dream grades" but we always aimed for the absolute best so what we'd actually achieve would be really good or at least satisfying to an extent. That's a great way to start, trust me: write down your dreams and set your goals, never stop assessing your own performance because that shit worksss. You never want to disappoint your own (days-younger) self who trusted you with their goals and fantasies!!! I'm rooting for you and I know by heart that it's just a temporary phase and you're a decision away from unleashing the beast in you and impressing yourself immensely.. NO ONE, and I mean no one, hasn't felt down and demotivated at a point in high school, it IS a stressful period that's a fact, but keep dreaming big and remember to always put your wellbeing first.. Also don't be hard on yourself, you've done your best given the circumstances and your level of focus and motivation then, but let's change that now and start a new page with brand new goals to pursue... I promise you you can do it. It will pass and you will be super proud of yourself later!!! <333
I'm here if you have more to rant about, and I'd be more than happy to check up on you regularly if you'd like... Smile, boy, you're all good!! :))
Re: what do i do how do i help myself
holy shit thank you so much... you have no idea how much this means to me! i will take your kind words into deep consideration and work to the best of my ability. thank you for listening to what i have to say; this is the first time someone really heard me out and gave me some awesome advice. i hope you have an amazing day!