Im single and always has been and that has been eating away my mental lately. Im not old but im to the point where everyone has girlfriends and i just get a wave of depression whenever i see a couple. And to only rub that in i'm extremely nervous around females and that has been my biggest insecurity since birth. It's just that all female friends ive had and grown comfertable around have moved out from my town or some other way. I don't want to remain single for all my teenagehood and it's just such a mental suckerpunch that that is very likely. How do relationships work? Do you just text someone that you're interested in and hope for the best? How do you know if someone's interested in you? How do you initiate and start a relationship? I'm just so lost to where i should begin! Please give me advice you just might save someone alot of depression.. Right now i'm just stuck in a feedback loop of confidence, procrastination and sadness.
Re: What is love?
Hey there first of all calm down you mind and relax..
dont overthink and Make stuffs complicated..
you are lucky that you are still a teen so there’s a long way to go and you have so many alternative to socialise..
be open frank honest and yes respectful...
try being a lil funny coz girls love humour..
your first step is socialise
so try making new friends around you.. even if you have few friends hangout with them..
be polite to everyone..
if you don’t like someone just stay don’t backbite about anyone even for the person who doesn’t treat you well..
Coz girls do start bitching and like gossip..
bt you don’t get with them..
coz this might lower your trust level..
(a person who is talking ill about someone behind his back could even leak my secrets or talk Ill and insult me..)
so be good gentle kind polite..
it will build your image talk to more people don’t just fall for anyone..
girls do get comfortable with few people Bt that doesn’t means she loves you..
you might loose their frndship too
never date the girl from the same circle..
now how would you approach them..??
actually you don’t have to approach anyone...
just visit local parks clubs cafe shops bar they might have regular customers...
who often visits their..
just be a regular visitor and sooner or later you’ll be a known person for staffs and other people around their and don’t just stop at one location there are malls theatre colleges you might also follow your passion.. joining arts or dance class..
make frnds and you’ll surely gonna meet that special person..
(Bdw I don’t believe in love )
Re: What is love?
First off, the issue that you're feeling is due to pressure.
I dont blame you. Society gives people this idea that you should have a 'childhood sweetheart'... date throughout your teens... then naturally progress into your twenties having already found 'the one' and you marry/settle down/sprout kids.
Nope. That is not human life. Quickly consider the context from where you speak. Obvs a western country with those norms ^^^^ Then realise that you have arranged marriages in the most of Asia (takes away that whole worry) and the traditions of tribes such as the Kengung of Cambodia which set up a sex hut for the women to have (voluntary) sex with the men she chooses to decide on who ultimately she wants as a husband.
My point is, you are not weird. There is no standard for you to live up to. You feel it though because us westerners are drummed in to meet this false standard of traditional trajectory of born/school/love/marrage/kids/success/death.
Secondly, women are not foreign beings to man. There are no simple distinctions between what makes a man a 'man' and a woman a 'woman'. I say this because you need to try and slowly understand that we aren't X and Y. We both feel the same emotions and culture is what makes us feel so different.
Finally, you will meet meaningful women in your life when you do what you love. You a gamer? Love resident evil, fifa, GTA, Silent Hill, fallout? Whatever, join a forum/group and chat... start a job... visit your local game/music/bar whatever
Then you will effortlessly end up talking to girls with the same intestest than you and then things can progress.
Point is, dont stress yourself. All these issues are because your putting yourself on a comparison platform which you will never win. No one would. You need to endulge and have fun with whatever you enjoy and if you do it socially (online groups/forums or regular bars/comic/music shops) you'll naturally start speaking to girls that you've got a common interest in.