anxiety
self-doubt
distraction
anxious

When I have self-doubt, anxiety, and self-consciousness, my brain latches on to a song or makes one up to hum.

Time Spent- 4m
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Today was not a stellar day at work, despite the day being a good one overall. However, as I get ready for bed I realized I was still singing the same song in my head that I had been ever since an incident happened at work. When I was fired from a previous job, through the tears and walk of shame to my car in the broad daylight, my mind found comfort in a tune it had created to be hummed. When I'm embarrassed or self-conscious, as I reflect now, I realize my mind has always done this for as long as I can remember in recent history (5 years[?] at least).


What could have caused my mind to use a tune as comfort? To distract itself from thoughts it cannot truly process in the moment? I don't know the answer. I was never a big music lover like the rest of my family was in my earlier years. Even though I'm only 18, I still don't think music is as necessary for me as it is for others in tasks like working out, driving, shopping, etc. So why does it comfort my racing mind by distraction? I doubt I'm the only one to do this, but it can't be common either, can it?


As I type this the song still plays in my head, pulling my attention away as I attempt to dive deeper into the reasoning behind it. Maybe some sleep will help rid me of this negative thoughts.


Goodnight.