time to time i think that i am so not enough for anything at all.
why i am the one from my friends r
to go through a lot of shit alone, to be not ugly but not that beautiful. I am not skinny and not fat either.
Will i ever feel like a complete person?
will there EVER be someone who will love me for who i am someone who will make me feel again.
Someone who will be the reason of my butterflies...
i fucking hate me but also love me.
seeing other girls who arw so skinny and pretty and get everything they want , good friends, someone special makes me hate myself why i cant be like that
i am so a body positive person but never for mtself my parents are yelling at me cuz i gained a little belly
i dont just complain i tried to change myself i tried to lose a little weight but i cant i chaned my hair my style is completely different now i love it when i look at myself in the mirror but when i go out and look at other i fill like a trash. that was one of the reasons why i stopped going out.
everyone i thought they are special (not only in the romantic way) fucking left me without any reason. shit got so fucked up that i went from having good grades was scared to talk but anyway i was talking to someone who will literally get an F just not to read something out loud. I have so much inside of me so much thoughts so much ideas ... the ones you want to share with someone at 4 am but i stopped sharing anything with anyone no one really know what kind of person i am no one know whats going on in my life.
i cant help myself i understand what i need to do but when there is a lot of people who don’t support you and bring you down its nor easy.
i hope this feeling will go away with age (17 now) maybe at my 25 i wont feel this way idk