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When will I ever be enough

time to time i think that i am so not enough for anything at all.

why i am the one from my friends r

to go through a lot of shit alone, to be not ugly but not that beautiful. I am not skinny and not fat either.

Will i ever feel like a complete person?

will there EVER be someone who will love me for who i am someone who will make me feel again.

Someone who will be the reason of my butterflies...

i fucking hate me but also love me.

seeing other girls who arw so skinny and pretty and get everything they want , good friends, someone special makes me hate myself why i cant be like that

i am so a body positive person but never for mtself my parents are yelling at me cuz i gained a little belly

i dont just complain i tried to change myself i tried to lose a little weight but i cant i chaned my hair my style is completely different now i love it when i look at myself in the mirror but when i go out and look at other i fill like a trash. that was one of the reasons why i stopped going out.

everyone i thought they are special (not only in the romantic way) fucking left me without any reason. shit got so fucked up that i went from having good grades was scared to talk but anyway i was talking to someone who will literally get an F just not to read something out loud. I have so much inside of me so much thoughts so much ideas ... the ones you want to share with someone at 4 am but i stopped sharing anything with anyone no one really know what kind of person i am no one know whats going on in my life.

i cant help myself i understand what i need to do but when there is a lot of people who don’t support you and bring you down its nor easy.

i hope this feeling will go away with age (17 now) maybe at my 25 i wont feel this way idk

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Re: When will I ever be enough

I have had this battle all of my life.

I'm 34 now and a mum of four wild boys.

I went through a lot as a kid, and was bullied through my teens, I thought I was fat, ugly stupid, my friends often took advantage of my generous nature. My father was violent and my mother critical and controlling it was toxic in the extreme.

I can see now that I was beautiful, I'd give my right arm to have that figure back! Perspective changes as you get older.

Your parents have no right to yell at you for your appearance, maybe they are projecting their own issues on to you? It's your body, weight comes and goes, you're still this beautiful sentient being wrapped up in this amazing miracle of biology that gets you from A to B.

It's ok to not be ok, and to ask for help when you need it! It sounds hippy dippy but meditation! Honestly! My life started to improve when I made time for myself and learnt to meditate. Now I don't mean sitting crossed legged fingers together chanting ommm I mean taking 5 minutes to clear your mind and the thoughts that come up in that time, greet them, address them and then dismiss them. It takes practice but it is so healthy!

Love will come! Friends will too, start with self love. When you start to compare yourself to someone else, instead of being hard on yourself find something positive that you can celebrate! It will feel difficult to begin with, but as with all change making a start is always hardest.

You are complete! Don't doubt yourself, you are amazing! You're full of light, love and infinite potential!