I don't know what to say, first time doing this stuff. Just searched stuff up in a stage of crying and slight rage and growing hatred at myself. I really want her, but I feel like that's just a joke. An awful, sick joke I created to amuse myself. One of my friends, apparently had a crush on me. And I didnt believe it at all, I mean shes perfect. Physically, and mentally and every way possible. But it turns out she really likes me. And I told my buddy who told me about this that I like her too. But dont tell a single soul.. They teased me about it for a while until I accidentally pressured them into confessing to their crush. I felt awful about it, and I felt like shit. But then she, (my friend) tells my crush I like them. And that'd be ok, and I'd normally freak out and get all excited but. It just wasnt healthy for my crush. There was a tiny bit of an age gap and I was no where close to what she needed to grow. So I ended up embarrassing myself just to get my best friend to say it was a prank. And now I'm sitting in my room crying silently to myself. Feeling like shit because now my crush thinks theres no way in hell I'd be worthy of dating or liking her. And that I'm rude. And it's so pitiful when I put it into words but. Writing this made me feel better. Just a tiny bit.
Re: Why I BROKE
Under pressure. I broke out and told her everything. She really likes me back and I like her. We're talking right now. How could such a bad day become so good. This is the best day of my life, I mean what the hell was I thinking get all upset and mopey. I should've just manned up sooner and tried to connect with her more. But now I realized that the world is only so rough because I make it out to be. Idk how this will go better then anticipated.
Perhaps I should start to see the world in new colours now. Damn. My lifes like a fucked up 90s commercial.