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Young Love

I'm 48 and have been extremely happily married for 22 years, my wife is my soul mate, and my best friend. And yes, I know how much that is a cliche. But quite often I think back and wish I could have that beginning of a relationship feeling again, getting to know each other, finding out about each others bodies, I do not want an affair, but I truly cannot stop thinking about those exciting beginnings. Is this normal? Does anybody else have this?

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Re: Young Love

After 35 yrs my wife divorced me out of the blue. At the divorce here was the reasons. No shit. I don’t look my age & young women ask me out. I act like a kid (true. I’m autistic). My penis is too big. It takes me too long to have sex. I made my kids exercise; do chores; eat healthy food; & study too much. I wouldn’t hug her mom after she yelled at me. Her mom yells at everybody. I wear a hat all the time but I have all my hair. I’m too lazy to style my curly hair every day so I wear a hat. She said you used to not wear a hat. Sure. I was young & worked. I’m old & retired. I watched movies with naked women in them. Stuff like American Pie. Sure. But I mostly watch other stuff like avengers & stuff. To her that’s porn. I own guns. Well I grew up hunting in a military family. But I lock them up with trigger locks in a gun safe at my step dads house. I wear a cowboy hat in public sometimes. Well we owned a cattle farm at one point. I got used to riding horses & chasing cows. I don’t dress up as a cowboy. I was more or less a cowboy.

She also brought up my camo. I grew up hunting. She talked about the day I cut off a snakes head & walked around with its body. It was a copper head near my kids. So I stepped on it. Cut its head off. Then tried to scare the kids with the body. Seemed funny to me. In my mind a deadly snake was by your kids; one of which is disabled. You should be glad to have a man who will just take out danger quick.

About a week later we started dating. We talk everyday. In her mind we are reconnecting & will remarry in the future. But I got a weird infection in my blood from this cheap place I rented. I gave them the house. I have a disease. The infection damaged my organs. I’ve almost died twice in the last two months. She doesn’t know. I smile at her. I’m sweet. But I think I’m dying. I pretend to be healthy around her. But I’m so weak. By the time she wants me back I’ll probably be gone. But I’ll wait in Heaven for her.

But of course. Part of the human experience is enjoying the novelties of the world. The measurement of what each of us considers novel is what inspires thoughts like yours.

Some people find new relationships with entirely new people novel, and no less can substitute. Some people can find a new way to hold hands and it is novel to them. The journey of discovery is often novel and that is a common ground for many of us, but what is worth discovery is what makes us different.

Young love is about a wide range of novelties. What a joy it is to learn so many new things at once.

I know what you're talking about. It's like at the beginning of the relationship, everything is so new and exciting. You get that fun butterflies in your stomach feeling just thinking about that person. After a while though, it feels like the excitement and magic disapears. Maybe it would be nice if you and your wife did the things like when you guys first met and started dating. See if that livens up some of those old feelings.