I know you’re there. I’ve known since I can remember. I saw all the things you showed me. All the things that would be denied me. The vulnerable look of desire. The nurturing touch. Love. Support. And most importantly, trust. My trust. You took it from me. You made sure the same betrayal would play out again and again, so that I’d just protect myself. You had a near orgasmic look of victory, of exultation, as you plunged your knife into my childish flesh. You knew the damage would spread like a disease. You laughed as I denied myself, seeing you behind her, within her. You howled in glee as I provoked her.
You giggled incessantly as I stayed away from the kids, not wanting your sickness to spread. But it did anyway. Every preventative measure failed. I still failed. You still win. If I could separate you from me, I’d kill you. But you’re my jailer. My guard. My demon. You loved me when none would. Thy rod comforts me. I’d kill you to free myself. But you are me, and I hate you. I love you for protecting me, and I hate you for needing you. You’re a mass of weakness, the ever growing body of proof you were right. You show me evidence that you are right. You’re every bit my equal in intellect. You’re the most convincing liar I’ve ever hated, and loved. Break me, and haunt me, my lovely demon. I’ve burnt you. I’ve drugged you. I’ve made you sleep. You heal fast. And you hate faster. I’m never at fault, my love, in your eyes. You’re there, with me, everywhere. Whispering your poison as I talk. Caressing my heart beneath your loving chains, and locking it away when others get too near. The last place to hide is where you’ve been hinting at for years, demon. i love you, demon. You took everything, now sleep with me forever.